Long Beach - February 1997
To: The Ixtlan Mailing List
Accounts from the Long Beach Workshop:
Here are some accounts of participants in the Carlos Castaneda’s Tensegrity
workshop, which took place in Los Angeles/Long Beach on February 15th and
16th 1997. The workshop was organized by Cleargreen, Inc. Thanks to all
writers.
A booklet was sold...
Mon Feb 17th, 1997:
A booklet was sold at this workshop, written by Carlos,
describing all the passes we performed and prefacing them with
dialogues he had with Don Juan.
One of the most relative things Carlos said at the workshop, was
that our mind is a foreign installation. Maybe I never got it
before??
So basically, almost everything we ask, every dialogue we have,
every thought (!) we have, and every dream we have isn't coming
from us.
He said sorcerers see the energy of all our internal organs
(liver, spleen, etc.) moving in a circular pattern. The energy
on top of our heads moves in a back and for the pattern like a
pendulum. This is the gift from the flyers. This is why we see
the world the way we do. Everything is a dichotomy. We can change
our minds easily, back and forth.
Everything.
So all these questions we ask aren't even us. They are them.
Think about that next time you open your mouth. :-) and get the book!
Tue Feb 18th, 1997:
This was the first time I got to see Carlos and Carol in person
(they were not at Omega) and I always hoped someone would
describe them, so I could imagine what they looked like. As if
they are real people. To make them more real to me more
accessible. Now I know it doesn't matter. They are real people,
for themselves, not for us. The passes are for us, and it is
enuf. Still, to the curious soul (like me), the desire to see
will always be there. So my advice do it!! Go to a workshop!!
My descriptions (and everyone else's) will never be enuf.
And do it soon, before he leaves.
PS: I just remembered something else about my desire to see
them. I believed that they represented the nagual purely, and
meeting them would be meeting the nagual. And it would catapolt
me, or something, into another attention. Well, actually, it did
do those things, but what really happened was my internal silence
was triggered my dialogue was cut off when they spoke, and so I
was able to execute the passes with more focus (less flyer!!).
But the nagual I wanted to meet is all around us. They really are
JUST PEOPLE! But they are the people that we are supposed to
be that we were meant to be perceivers of the awareness that
flows into the universe. It is our destiny and our right!! And it
has been stolen from us to feed a species that somehow
manipulated our energy to serve them. We carry their mind in our
heads spend our lives doing what they want, saying what they
want, thinking what they want. To get angry is useless it is a
predatory universe. To get even would only feed them fuller. We
need only to get well.
Sat Feb 22nd, 1997:
I didn't actually take notes, preferring to just get blasted and
store the memories in my AP.
Weeks before the workshop I had been reading some astrological
reports which talked about a powerful alignment of planets during
the 14-16 of Feb 1997. Apparently, this may be the most powerful
alignment of planets this century, according to some astrologers.
Basically, most of the planets are in Aquarius, and the gist of
it is that there couldn’t be a better, more auspicious time for
everyone, it indicates a time of pure magic, where what is set in
motion during this brief period will have long long reaching effects.
The workshop was MIND BLOWING, literally! I was familiar with the
three videos and the westwood series (from print) previously but
I was surprised at how easy it was to learn most of the new
movements, I guess that's mass.
Carlos was great, I was surprised at how thin his legs were, in
fact, most of the them, the witches etc. seem to have very
slender/sleek builds. It made me wonder if that wasn’t a product
of the movements.
Carlos at once seemed so normal yet the delivery of his words was
extremely powerful. Carol Tiggs was truly awesome. At one point
she was talking about how we are always surrounded by infinity
even though we are not aware of this. As she was talking about
this the room we were in started to look and feel very fake to
me, as if it were a movie set, and I had a feeling that outside
those walls was an infinite black void, was nothingness.
As I listened to the Blue Scout talk I began to get a sense, like
in a lot of sci-fi movies where aliens are disguised as humans,
that she wasn't human at all, but rather an insect, it gave me a
bit of a sick feeling in my stomach. Perhaps I was tapping into
the alieness of her energy. It was only after I got back home
that I realized that the passes that deal with the Blue Scout
involve making a pincer-like insect formation with the hand, and
making a slight buzzing sound with the mouth!
Generally, it's hard to put a lot of what I feel into words, I
feel very bottled-up. However, by the time I left for home, and
over the last week I have felt quite changed, at a very deep
level. One of the things I feel is a great sense of urgency,
like, there is a wave out there, and I can ride it if I want to,
it's a real possibility, so I can't afford to waste time, I can't
even afford to lose this feeling. I was surprised to read today
in Carlos opening to the new book that this is in fact, one of
the main things he noticed was the effect of mass: Urgency. It's
like so many things that may have been slight issues for me
previously are now definitely non-issues: like a career for
example. I don't know if it would be accurate to say that I have
changed directions, but that's what it feels like. It's like my
life has been silently re-prioritized and simplified. There is a
road ahead, with no turns or offshoots, and it leads to Freedom.
My sense is that one of the most important effects of a workshop
is that, in comparison to the Social Order, there is an opposite
peer-pressure on the AP. You really get a feel for the milieu. I
would urge anyone who hasn't made it to a workshop yet, to go,
not to hear and see Carlos, but to get blasted. I know for myself
it was a minor miracle that I was able to get to this one, with
costs and timing etc... but in retrospect that almost seems like
a test of sorts. In any case, I like most of you, had been doing
the passes and recap for some time now on my own, which
ultimately is the most important thing, to DO IT, but after the
workshop, I feel that there are opportunities that mass can offer
us that would probably take a long time to make available by just
working by oneself.
Another thing that I was left with was the certainty, for myself
anyway, that doing the passes and using the paperweight and balls
are the most efficacious way to achieve inner silence as opposed
to any variation on eastern meditation. The balls are great, I
mean, now I don't need an excuse anymore to play with my balls!
The thing that Taisha talked about which left the deepest
impression was her saying that resolutions, decisions etc... are
useless, in fact, utterly useless, that they are externals. What
you need to do is to turn the screwdriver a half-a-notch, which
really means reaching some kind of threshold in clearing our link
with intent. When we do this, there is a domino effect, and then
things just start to change without any doing on our part. The
way she talked about this, something really got through to me,
and I am left with a sense of short-term purpose: to reach that
threshold, or turn the screwdriver half-a-notch, and let the
dominoes fall, which means don’t worry about your job, where
you’ll be in two years and so on. Just mash that Intent, and at
some point things will start to really change.
Another thing Taisha said was that at some point doing Tensegrity
will, ...make you want to SCREAM!... And that if you do you
have lost your sobriety. I found this comment very odd, it really
piqued my curiosity. And sure enough, the next day, on the way
home, I had this feeling that... I WANTED TO SCREAM!!!! And it
was so powerful, and very wild, and also hard to contain, which I
guess means sobriety is something I need to work on, which is no
surprise to me. But I do find it somehow surprising that
Tensegrity makes me want to scream, I don't know...
That's about all I can seem to formulate into words at this time
so I'll end here.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Thu Feb 20th, 1997
It was my first Tensegrity workshop. When I saw that it was
announced exactly at the date of my birthday I felt the urgent
wish to go there. But first it seemed impossible because of
financial limitations, but suddenly somewhat like a door opened,
and everything fit well in my birthday wish to be there...
A big blue pyramid... This was the place where the workshop
happened. The pyramid stands free in CSULB campus, a huge region
of different buidlings, schools, libraries, fountains, sport
fields, parking areas, lawn, flowers and many different wonderful
trees. Los Angeles a town with no winter nearly unimaginable for
a central European, who is used to long cold winter seasons,
seeing no flowers in nature for some months...
The entry to the workshop started on Saturday early at 7 a.m. up
to 9 a.m. I had to fill a blank with name, address, age,
experiences, health, and I had to sign that I am responsible for
everything happening to me during the workshop. Then I was
checked with an electronic tool for camera or tape recorder.
There was already a little line of workshop visitors when I
arrived at about 7.45. I felt attentively guided from Cleargreen
staff people from step to step by this check-in procedure. I got
an identification card with name and number.
Then I really could enter the workshop area—a huge sport field
under the roof of a high blue pyramid...
On one side of the huge room was the bookstand, where between
video tapes, T-shirts, Tensegrity balls, paperweight and other
books, a new book of Carlos Castaneda was sold: Tensegrity the
magical passes of the sorcerers of ancient Mexico, edited by
Cleargreen.
I read most of this book in my airplane home, and it was really a
great pleasure to read it. Carlos tells in his well known style
how Don Juan told him the passes, how don Juan thought about
them, how they should be practiced, and about their expected
effect on a warrior. And I had such a pleasure to read this. It
was as if I was so familiar with the style as it was the same
style in which Carlos wrote all his books telling stories about
his being together with don Juan so that my last reservations
against Tensegrity fell down. It nearly seemed as if I only had
not accepted Tensegrity because I had not heard about it in this
well known style of don Juan talking with Carlos in the other
books... :-)
And the description of each pass is really amazing. There are
plain words for the moving of the body as well as an explanation
about the intended effect of each pass. It was mostly easy for me
to remember the passes as I learn to practice them now at home.
At it is really a pleasure to read it! I am very thankful to have
this great guide.
Well, and the workshop started with a lecture of Carlos Castaneda
himself... I was finally very happy to see him in person. He is a
small man with grey hair, but he looks so agile, so vivid, so
powerful and these both levels of his being not only what meets
the eye I could also realize in his talking. He brought words,
and in his first lecture I understood less than half of his
English. It was my first time in an English speaking country, and
I haven't learned English at school very well. Carlos seemed to
have a hard South American accent in his English for me, and it
was very exhausting to try to understand the meaning of his
sentences. Later on Saturday he gave a second lecture, and I
understood again much less, but I felt really touched, and I
nearly slept away...
On Sunday he gave the last lecture in the afternoon. And it was
amazing: I understood each word that he said. I had no problem
with his accent, with the speed of his talking and with my
attention to listen. It was as if Tensegrity had brought me in
his time...
Taisha Abelar also gave 3 short lectures. She looks very vivid
and young, thin, kind, with short cut hair—as they all have. I
was told that the short cut hair is a sign to leave personal
history behind. Taisha talked about the passes, about
self-indulgence, and many other topics which I can't remember.
For me it was as if her words (and also the words of the other
lecturers) were brought into the actual presence there, and there
they were exactly put how they should be. So later there is
nothing to speak about, as they have nothing to do with another time.
Carol Tiggs gave 2 short lectures. She is amazing. For me it was
as if she plays the roll of the warrior who has escaped social
order to perfection. I remember that she talked about
Shanty-town, the place where people usual are stuck: Oh, this is
nice of you-effects :-) Oh, you are ugly!-effects :-( and so on.
So she showed how we are triggered by words from other people...
and how we move from one triggered reaction to another, but we
always stay in Shanty-town, being triggered by other
people unless we start to live like a warrior, practice
controlled folly and recapitulation as a constant battle. She
also does her recapitulation daily, she or Taisha said. This is a
daily fight with no end... as long as we interact with other humans...
Well, and in between there were the passes. A real great number
of passes! And it was my first workshop! But it was not so
difficulty. There were 4 stages on the ground, and on each stage
stood 2 energy trackers from time to time alternating the 8 men
and the 8 women. One of them showed a pass, explained it, and the
other trackers showed the pass too, so that all people round the
stages could see them and follow them.
It was really amazing. I guess that there were about 600 people
around, but everybody could see to a stage, and moving after the
call of an energy tracker at the same time was no difficulty. It
was really amazing for me how these people from all over the
world worked on their bodies, teaching their bodies the passes,
following the instructions of the energy trackers...
I didn't talk to many people there, but I had the impression that
there were mostly real interested people there who really took
the chance to learn, to fight their laziness and stupidity, to
open to a door to freedom and they were ready to bring their full
engagement as a blank cheque for freedom...
On Saturday evening the energy trackers showed some long magical
passes, partly also using real knifes. There were 2 women showing
the same pass, and it was amazing how they performed it together
in the same speed... I felt impressed by the power of intent and
the courage to move by the hell of it... And I again noticed that
those sorcerers only have the time of one life to escape death...
Another highlight of the workshop was the evening lecture of the
Blue Scout. She is a very slender young woman, maybe in her early
twenties, with reddish-blond hair and glasses. She is also one of
the energy trackers, and she performs the passes with amazing
brilliance and plainness.
In the evening she read for a long time from the new book of
Carlos Castaneda Memorable Events, which is not printed up to
now. For me her reading was put in an amazing hall of inner
silence word by word. As if a great space of eternity was created
where she placed each word... It touched me very deeply, and it
seems to be stored directly like a big treasure in my body—where
no words can express what this means...
Angelika |