Pasadena - November 1996
To: alt.dreams.castaneda
Pasadena Dreaming
This account conveys some personal feelings and observations
from the Pasadena workshop.
A word of caution:
1. Set and Setting
Workshop surroundings were nice and quiet due to the
thanksgiving holidays. North Wind with clear skies charged the air.
Cleargreen managed the workshop professionally. Service and
security functioned well. Cleargreen persons were as usual
always helpful when needed.
2. Participants
About 750 people participated in the workshop. As far as I was
able to figure out the people came rather evenly from South
and North America and Europe including Russia. I didn’t detect
any blacks and only one Asian.
The most striking feature about the participants was that
there was nothing striking about them! The ages of the
participants ranged from 18 up to 60, maybe a bias to the age
group 20 - 40, a couple of kids under 18. About equal numbers
of the different sexes, probably rather even occupational
distribution. They looked, felt, thought and behaved as a
standard normal human beings would. If pressed hard I could
admit grudgingly that there were a few proper tonals, maybe
even a couple of beings with inner grace.
The superficial reasons for participating vary: search for
love, need to be discovered, need to find answers to personal
VERY IMPORTANT questions, need to gather status by meeting
the famous Carlos Castaneda, curiosity, hope to gain some
insights and power by rubbing against the sorcerers, need to
find spiritual leader or mother or father figure. Some came
because they had to without knowing for sure why or they came
for learning the passes or just for listening. The obvious common
denominator for everybody is that they have read of the books and
have been impressed by them.
I liked the general mood of the seminar which was relaxed and
to the point. I think that during the workshop most were able
to be less of the usual asshole and more the silent being who
is going to die.
3. Passes
The passes were taught by two groups of six practitioners.
The groups were male and female. I like them, they seem to be
modest in the right way, proper tonals.
The first series taught, heat series, forges the luminosity
of the two separate sides of the body. The movements are not
very complex, but they can anyway be difficult to execute
properly. One has to give everything to them, the mood has to
be of power and vigor, even positive aggressiveness. The mass
of the participants and presence of the nagual facilitated
the learning and proper execution of the passes tremendously.
When I went home I noticed that it is altogether too easy to
fall into flimsy execution without much effort.
It is good advice to do the heat series sparingly as Carlos
wrote afterwards. I overdid them and ended up being
over-energized to the point that I couldn’t sleep and I felt
like continuously burning inside. Powerful stuff!
It is easy to fall into conducting the heat series as
physical exercises. For sure everybody noticed their muscular
effects (where did those muscles pop into existence!) but the
abstract purpose - forging the two sides of the body - is their
intent.
If I understood it right the instructions stressed that the
explosive energy for the strikes comes from the abdominal
region in contrast to some other passes where the energetic
center is in the kidney region.
Although the heat series is done with great force I have not
noticed any physical injurious effects. It was instructed
never to extend the arms fully during the strikes and never
to do the passes obsessively. Relaxation and tension should
alternate also in the crab strike where it is too easy to
tense shoulders continuously. Searing pain is for sure a sign
of wrong technique or over doing of the passes.
The primate series is one of the most fun passes. Many other
passes are strange, dreamlike, impersonal and abstract but
the primate series delivers familiar feelings from our close
ancestors. Feels good!
The egg series is also fun. I can almost see that shining egg now.
The pass for the left side is rather complex especially for
persons whose kinesthetic memory is not well developed but
with the help of my friends I was able to learn it. It is
true that it can give sad feelings but doing it more I have
learned to love it. It is silent, modest, abstract and
elegant. It is but it is not.
Two breaths and beginning of the series for tendon energy
or energy center manipulation were taught.
I am not sure if it was the mass of the workshop, the nagual,
the passes, manipulation of the energy centers or what but I
was able to enter into dreaming awake a couple of days after
the seminar. Waves emanating from the left side and currents of
“electricity” running on the body and back of the scull
started during the seminar and culminated in a brief
cancellation of the learned interpretation system when I did
the passes at some odd hour and place. The happy part was
that it happened so smoothly. I was dreaming awake in a most
natural way! And after that - nothing. Carlos is right when
he says we all see energy as it flows in the universe and
that sorcery is actually very simple. But it takes time
to perfect the transition and make it *intentional*. I suspect
that it has to do with the fact that we would decay or
be lost if we would stay in the second attention before we have
the required discipline, energy and sobriety.
I made the mistake of the old sorcerers when the left side
started to wake up. Excruciating vigilance must be maintained
from moment to moment to eliminate self congratulation,
heightened sense of self worth and greediness. The most one can
hope for is to witness the world outside ourselves. We are
truly nothing.
4. Sorcerers
Calumetto wrote that it is difficult to know what the
sorcerers are. The mind enters into a void when trying to
describe them. They are genuinely paradoxical. Feelings
towards them tend to be also paradoxical and contradictory. I
am not attempting here to draw not even an approximate
picture of them because it will be impossible. I’ll just
write without coherence some bits and pieces floating around.
Sorcerers are true artists. All of them are superb speakers.
Maybe their verbal expressions could be compared to the Art
of Fugue.
They are energetically stronger than anybody I have met and yet
vulnerable to the core.
The impression they give is massive silent energy on top of
which their personalities play freely.
Their energy is *very* intense and disconcerting. Next to
them I feel like a wet rag.
For me their mood was summed up by the statement that they
only have their fight and the being who is going to die. They
will fight whatever the outcome and it is impossible to take
away the being who is going to die. In the final analysis
freedom may be just a dream but the fight will remain to the end.
I have the impression that they give their everything during the seminars.
It is inconceivable that they wouldn't share the knowledge
of the passes because there will be no lineage after them.
Carlos said that he thinks dJ as well as the whole lineage
before him got caught in tradition (the rule ?). The tradition
required tremendous secrecy about the magical passes. “Go to the
elders and ask. And the elders say: No, no.” That has changed now.
Carlos is physically small but his energy makes him massive.
I imagine it is like a dense block of dark stone lying on its
side and extending to some distance off his physical body.
Lots of people say that Carlos is like dJ. How do they know? ;-)
Carlos said that all they can offer is work and discipline.
They said that shit tends to float to the surface at the
presence of the sorcerers (I think this was in connection
with some description of their experiences with dJ). I for
sure felt my shit hitting the fan the instant Carlos started
talking. And of course I got mad to the imp who dared to do
that to me ;-)
Carlos is charming. He is funny beyond belief (my diaphragm
still hurts). And he is not funny at all. He is scary because
he doesn’t care to pretend to be concerned about your preciousness.
They are not here to hold our hands like mamas and papas.
My feeling is that they feel acutely responsible for the
knowledge they are passing. So I think that they try to
smooth out the rough edges which could send people freaking out.
They attempt to bypass the (flyer) mind when speaking to us.
A better name for flyer is "cosmic prowler". The name Los
Voladores was inherited from the old sorcerers.
dJ forced them to do outrageous not-doings. They will
introduce more intelligent ones to us.
The discussion about the more esoteric subjects like
dreaming doesn't lead very far. When the inner silence is
attained dreaming and other things will emerge by themselves.
They have hoped that explaining things would help us arrive
into realization and make the jump. Obviously there has not
been much progress so in the future practical actions will be
emphasized even more than before.
Taisha's pass demonstrated the intent of the sorcerers.
The pass exemplified in my mind dreaming and INFINITY.
It was strangely familiar. Taisha stared into Infinity at
the and of the pass and afterwards it was difficult for her
to start speaking once again.
Their acts create cognitive dissonance which destroys
internal dialogue.
When inner silence is attained anything is possible. The
possibilities are endless, endless … (You should have *heard*
how Carlos said this. Still gives me shivers.)
As a sorceric task Carlos had to take care of the three
witches. dJ said that to manage them is as difficult as
changing the chain of a chain saw while it is running.
Some people saw their eyes. Shivers…
They are more human and non-human than anybody I have met before.
When Carlos realized what was happening to him he was already
cooking (follows a funny cannibal joke). dJ gave them no
choice but Carlos would like us to choose the sorcerers' world.
What sorcerers mean by power becomes evident at their
presence. Who has glimpsed the annihilating force in the
universe understands that there is no possibility to beg
favors. The only way to stand infinity is power.
Carol gave us a stupendous gift of power but how many were
aware of it?
dJ said: "Trust only infinity."
5. Aftermath
The question which have been posed is: is it worth while
going to the workshops? To imitate Carlos I would say that
this question can’t be answered meaningfully. Sorcery is not
an asset. You don’t count gains and losses on the warriors way.
I thank the sorcerers for a magnificent workshop.
|